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Are you preparing to divorce for the second time?

The divorce rate in the U.S. has been decreasing in recent years. Still, a high number of second marriages break up.

A variety of reasons for this exist, and some of them are quite surprising. There is one common thread, however: Since you have already gone through divorce once, you know more about what to expect the second time around.

Why divorce happens again

After your first marriage, it may have taken a few years for you to walk down the aisle for the second time. You may have felt more confident about a second marriage, thinking you learned from the mistakes you made previously. You may have thought that a second marriage would help you heal from the pain of your first divorce; in other words, you may have been on the rebound to some extent even years after your first marriage. On the other hand, your new spouse may have fallen short of your expectations, so the second marriage may have been doomed anyway.

Emotional issues

There is a greater chance for divorce if your spouse is insecure or is struggling with an anxiety disorder. Lack of commitment is also a big issue in a second marriage, one that leads to 73 percent of divorces. Statistics indicate that one in four second marriages last no longer than five years. While 65 percent of all the divorces on record involve those aged 25 to 39, the divorce rate for people aged 65 and over has doubled in the decades since 1980. Part of the reason for this is that a second divorce is not the eyebrow-raising event it once was in our society.

Moving forward

The majority of people who divorce say that in retrospect, they wish they had tried harder to make the marriage work. Still, if you and your spouse have made the decision to end your marriage, you at least have had some experience and can hope that the process you select, whether litigation, mediation or collaboration, will make divorce easier the second time around.

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